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(What is YOUR story??)

Each person has an unconscious program or story that is running which determines what you get in real life. This story arises early on as a child as a means to cope, survive and deal with the outer environmental influence where you learn to be loved and accepted. Each person will ‘buy into’ different ways of getting love in ways which are self defeating and become sabotage programs which result in frustration, helplessness, disillusionment etc., based on what they have been exposed to.

Unfortunately most of us do not have ideally functional and balanced role models as a child where adults are able to provide the utmost form of unconditional love and support in a competent, balanced manner. An analogy is that of us being a generational of baby birds in a nest that are expected to fly freely, and unfortunately we are judged and blamed if we cannot fly; but the parents in the nest cannot fly themselves. A pressure is placed on the child to achieve that which the parents cannot. Children, in turn, become parents themselves and the patterns repeat. There is no judgement in that parents are always doing the best under the circumstances, but this is what emerges.

By addressing the logic of the unconscious mind, these patterns, belief systems and emotional content of these programs may be addressed and reprocessed for the better.

This, in turn will bring the desired result of unconditional love and support that we all strive for which allows us to expand into, express and realize the authentic aspects of who you really are. This enables the realization of your full potential, which is lying dormant, waiting to unravel and manifest. The logic of the unconscious mind is that of a child and it is held in the body. An experiential way of dealing with this part of us is required in order to appeal to and change the range of functioning and behaving. It is like riding a bicycle; the process needs to be integrated through repetition and experientially doing it, rather than gaining intellectual knowledge and consciously understanding it. If a seed has the right form of sand and water, it can grow into all that it is, similarly, with the right love and support, we can achieve our purpose.

Debbie Howes is a clinical psychologist who works with the story of ‘Little Red Riding Hood’ as a projective and drawing technique as the story holds all the dynamics of the unconscious mind. Each person will tell a different version of the story from the unconscious mind. The way in which you tell the story will indicate the belief systems and patterns that need to be addressed for change to occur.

By reprocessing and changing each person’s story, the corresponding tools, insights and mechanisms are downloaded and made available for change for the better to arise where you may achieve your full potential.

This process is similar for adults and children in that even although you are an adult, the unconscious mind is still a child. This is why a person may know intellectually what they need to do, and have read all the books about it, but experientially this does not happen where the body does something contrary to what is known. This is typical of the addictive cycle. As a society we are in a very addictive generational cycle where we are programmed to need and desire something external to us, which in fact breaks us down and is not conducive to our best interests. This may extend to relationships, shopping, eating, drinking, fashion, and the way in which we define how we are loved, acknowledged and validated.

This forces us to adopt and relate in an inauthentic way to achieve a result, which in fact is an illusion of support. We often define ourselves in terms of material objects, money, status and prestige to the detriment of core values of truth, love and sincerity of self. By realigning with the authentic self, the possibilities become probabilities where results emerge.

Can you imagine living in a world where you are living as your authentic self where what you express outwardly is in full alignment with what you are feeling inwardly, where you can fully radiate all that you are without fear, while being able to discern right from wrong, truth from illusion, and fully being able to act appropriately in a manner which guarantees results where you are fully manifesting and living your truth in an elegant way?

Debbie Howes - Clinical psychologist
082 850 9181

Born to Shine Magazine